Feel

I've come to understand that in life the roads one chooses regardless of distance are never easy to venture. Now I speak from an emotionally disadvantaged perspective, all I've had for emotional support is a quick sand foundation to which I've had to learn through experience how not to wiggle & struggle but rather be still, calm, then slowly pull myself out. Broken promises formed a huge part of my early teenage hood. Gullible, I was a naïve young blood who feigned heavily on others opinions about self, much like a new born baby, its mother's milk & love. I trusted what kept coming my way, dished out in sizable portions which at the time tasted like a nutritious source for the esteem. Gods & Deities materialized in all relationships & acquaintances formed, sacrificial worships poured down the fields that these immortals trotted to "plant" crops that lasted 4 seasons, choosing to see only the good that they spoke of like the congress in the gathering of our council priest. As the winters fell giving way to the springs to blossom with joy, greeting the summers as they awoke & rose like the jolly sun in the mornings I found no comfort in anything but my solace, to the point that I indulged in watching the autumns shed their tears, leaving bare the souls of that which was green with envy I still love selflessly.